I think about it again and again. See?? I frustated just because a small matter. And that small matter will be a big matter FOR ME ONLY. He doesnt care. No one care. I want to kill my emotion. make my life is lifeless. I dont want to care, but i must care. I smile, poker face, emotionless face without meaning. I feel like live in the darkness and nothing. I hurt myself. I see my own blood. I dont feel anything weird. Or maybe everything is weird, but because everything is weird, it is normal. FOR THEM. Not for me. Am i happy i am still here? maybe yes maybe not.
I close my eyes and my ear. I dont want to hear and see anything. Why? I dont know. I just dont want to. I didnt use to like the darkness. I want to say something. But my mouth cant say anything anymore. i scared..., but no one know. I cant shout, I cant talk. I just sit on the corner, alone. Lock myself in my own world. forget my surrounding and sunk into my imagination. I create a story from you all. From boys, girls, friends, enemy, and else. My own story....
I stare at clock. Hope a hours will be past fast. But what i can do? i cant control time.
I stare at sky. Hope it will rain. But it still sunny and i cant do anything else except image it.
I stare at nothing. i see nothing. My vision is start to blurry. Ahh... I hope i can see something else.
I always think someone else look at me or see me. I dont like it. When they see me with that eyes. They mocked me again..., im angry but i cant angry.
Argh... just forget it about what i write :)